2023 is knocking at the door. With it come those dreaded New Year Resolutions. In case you’re already searching for reasons (if not excuses) why to NOT add “Weight Loss” to your 2023-To-Do-List, we compiled 96 more or less serious ones for you. Enjoy!
1. You start the work out program too hard
Most people get so motivated that they work out for 1 to 2 hours to start the New Year workout season at full force, screaming and growling after each rep; then they get too sore to comeback for a second month, week, or even day of training. Ease into your workout program. If you haven’t so much as done a push up since gym class in P.S. one fifty whatever, start exercising by lightly jogging or walking briskly for 20 to 30 minutes. Then as your heart gets used to pumping blood faster, your body will push you to start running up hills, doing push ups or bench pressing 25 lbs. weights for 12 to 15 reps.
2. You frequently stop exercising for two weeks or more
I endured a year-long hiatus until the day I was taking longer breaths than a Yoga instructor to muster up the strength to suplex my brother when he had me pinned to my mattress. Shirtless, I looked like Al Bundy with a sprayed on tan. Don’t break, moderate. Replace your set of 8X200 meter wind sprints with an 8-minute a mile 3-mile jog when you’re sick and tired of that 7 am rude awakening to get your heart up to 150 bpm. Do just 3 sets of pull-ups instead of a full circuit of pull-ups, dips, leg raises, and plyometrics. As you get strong again, your body will ask for more.
3. You will always eat anything in sight
Currently, I diet at a maximum from Monday to Friday. I diet for peak performance eating fiber rich carbs with low-fat protein and mono-unsaturated fat to control my insulin levels and have my body use fat for fuel to train with more energy, but I have been able to maintain my weight during sedentary periods when I haven’t worked out for a week or two, like when my son was born. The key to my commitment to this diet is because when I do get cravings for ice-cream or loads of bread, I go for it until I can’t eat anymore. Nonetheless, when gluttonous, I eat a perfectly balanced snack – 1/2 cup of unsweetened Kefir, two or three berries (any kind), and a spoonful of peanut butter – before bedtime, and the next day I eat my hormonally balanced pre-workout snack and insulin controlling breakfast – two egg white omelette, topped with 4 ounces of melted low-fat cheddar cheese, 1 1/2 strips of turkey bacon, a cup of hot cocoa and milk sweetened with stevia, a 1/4 cup of oatmeal sweetened with stevia, a slice of fruit bread with a carb count of 11 grams, and about three tablespoons of natural crunchy peanut butter – within two hours after the workout. It puts me right back into the fat burning zone I was in prior to the binge, and keeps my hunger under control for four to five hours which makes me less likely to overeat again. I repeat this routine, however, twice on the weekend.
Find a diet that you can jump in and out of, because you will break it. Use stevia instead of sugar. Reduce sugar by all means. Sugar raises insulin to the point that it prevents your body from burning fat; when I eliminated sugar from diet I lost about 20 lbs in less than a month. Find healthy replacements for the foods you love; I replaced my routine for chomping down Baby Ruth’s and Almond Joys for pears or apples with peanut butter, after eating an adequate amount of protein; maybe that combination wont work for your palette, but find one that does.
I sincerely regard the Zone Diet by Dr. Sears as the best in the fitness industry to assist you in this process. His resources are the oldest I have found proving the benefits of the 40-30-30 eating plan – 40% carbohydrates, 30% protein, 30% fat.
4. You keep following the same diet with no success
My cousin’s sister-n-law has been dieting since I met her about 10 years ago; she still looks like Rosie O’Donnell with a blond wig. If something is not producing the results you want, try something else. I was once on this diet that had me down to 140 lbs at 5′8, with the six pack of Bruce Lee. My blood sugar would crash hourly, nevertheless, and I couldn’t run or workout anywhere as near as hard as when I’m at my peak performance level. I started following Dr. Barry Sears’ advice and got my mile down to five minutes and a half; I could do about 28 dead-hang pull-ups.
5. You only workout at the perfect time
I have been guilty of this reason, when feeling too sick or rundown to even walk around the house let alone run or do pullups. Before writing this paragraph, however, I ran up muddy hills, hopping over downed tree limbs, drenched in rain water, while my legs were getting numb covered by cold and soaked sweat pants. Even when the quarter-mile track on which I sprint has had 1 to 2 feet of snow stacked on top, I have thrown on the Timberlands and stomped my way through it for a few laps. I even warm up my hands by stuffing them in my pants, so my palms touch the skin on the side of my thighs when it gets too cold to grab on the freezing metal pullup and dip bars; my hands burn if I don’t.
The point is if I stopped working out during all those times that weather would stop most people, I would lose my drive, and would relinquish the luxury of eating almost anything I want, while still losing weight. The effects of weather, time restraints, and other obstacles that get in your way of a regular workout can all be overcome.
6. You fear pain
Who doesn’t? There’s been more than one shit-faced day that I have dreaded the onset of having to bend on one knee, breathing harder than Darth Vader after he got his arm chopped off by Luke Skywalker, after doing 8 100m windsprints. I sincerely believe pain can be disconnected… at least most of it. Practicing Yoga, I learned that by deeply focusing on your breath while inhaling and exhaling, you could ignore the nerves that are telling you that you are in pain. I recommend Yoga for anybody that can relate. It’s all about pain tolerance. Pain is the challenge of a solid workout program that once overcome makes the post-workout endorphin high your day’s cup of coffee. It’s what makes you need it.
7. You don’t workout on a hangover
Like who does, right? But if you absolutely need to get a workout in 5 to 6 days a week to keep your “eat whatever I want” attitude from clumping you up like a sack o’ dirty laundry, skip the family-sized triple shot of Jack at the Saturday night party and drink some wine. It helps your heart, and in my experience it doesn’t hang me over to the point that the bed spins when I wake. My secret is to take a teaspoon of 1500 mg of EPA in fish oil before I eat my balanced bedtime snack – 1/2 cup of kefir that packs 7 grams of protein and 4.5 grams of carbs, a strawberry or two and a spoonful of olive oil to keep the carbs from triggering the insulin that’ll drop my blood sugar and give me a dizzy spell.
8. You don’t workout when sick
You’ve got to stay active by all means necessary when a virus has a hold of you. Yes, get your bedrest for the first two or three days or whatever your doctor recommends.
I recently had a bad sore throat that triggered a cold sweat that stopped me from working out for three days. The fourth day, however, I got into my light-workout routine – jogging at a slow pace for 45 minutes to an hour – and my nose got runny and cleared my head. My sore throat was as about as painful as a swig of Mama Juana; web definition: a slight dryness when I swallowed. I continued my day as usual, and I was still fighting the sore throat at the time of this paragraph’s writing, but it never got to the point where my body had to heat itself into a cold sweat to cure it.
9. You smoke
Don’t end up like Ronaldo Martinez cleaning the hole in your neck with a cotton swab talking about your life will never be the same out of a speaking device. Although some people actually stay thin smoking because it controls the insulin hormone which triggers hunger. You won’t be able to workout as intensely because of your limited lung capacity. But who knows; Ricardo Mayorga won the WBC, and WBA Welterweight Championship smoking loosies and drinking beer.
10. You don’t breathe deeply enough
Inhale so your chest expands as the air cools your lungs linings. It stretches out your torso and gets you focussed on your workout. Deep breaths give you the strength and desire to dig out that kick that’ll drive you to finish.
11. You don’t listen to music that gets you going
Listen to music that thumps beats that pump your adrenaline enough to get your blood pumping like a fire hose. You’ll get going.
12. You don’t open your eyes wide enough
Wake UP, lil’ Suzy! Widen your eyes, your mouth, your nostrils, contract all the muscles you’re using and expand. Your blood’ll start rushing. Get that wind behind your back and get moving.
13. You don’t warm up enough
Swing your right leg across your left and swing it back up the right side of your body for 20 repetitions; do the same with your left leg. I also cock each leg back, like I’m trying to kick the back of my head with my heel, and kick forward as far as I can like I’m trying to touch the front of my forehead with my toes. Hop like the Fox Robot warming up during NFL commercial breaks; ensure your heels kick your butt to get amped. Disclaimer: My workout is very cardio, and circuit-training intense, which means I barely rest in between sets; hence do a warm up that gives you the energy to open your eyes wide enough to finish your reps strong. Bruce Lee wrote that a good rule of thumb was to always rehearse the motions of the exercise without resistance before engaging the weight. So if you’re going to do pullups extend your arms up and pull them down as many times as you plan to do resisted repetitions.
I also jog for 8 to 10 minutes before I get into it too hard. If you don’t warm up, you run a greater risk of getting hurt that can stop you from working out and keep you, yes you, fat.
14. You don’t stretch after your workout
You are so sore that you can’t bend your arms or walk without looking like that guy that got sodomized with a double-serrated knife in “American Me.” Then you don’t come back to the gym until the next New Year.
Again I prescribe Yoga. I got into a car accident when I was eighteen that left my back so weak that it felt tired after walking a block. I used to walk as if I was an 80 year old man bent over a cane. Yoga had me walking straighter than the Korean army.
15. You only workout at the perfect place
I started doing pullups by lodging a metal bar across the front entrance of my basement apartment. The entrance was a staircase that led to the front door into the house’s parking lot floor. The bar rested on the two edges of the floor that stood one flight above my front door entrance. The space in between was about twice as wide as me and deep enough for me to hang from the bar in mid air. You could also buy one of those pull up fixtures that you could hang from one of your door frames that they sell in sports and goods store for less than $20, or a pullup bar that hangs from your door that you could get at www.navyseals.com.
I used to do my dips between two bar stools. I ran around my block between sets. I did the other calesthenics on my floor. I used to do Yoga on the side walk barefoot, while passerby ask me, “Are you alright?” because I was bent into a swastika stretching out my thighs. Now I workout at a playground jungle gym with a pullup bar, dip bar, and small cushioned track. Where there is a will, there is a way, and this cliche is by no means exclusive to your monthly gym dues.
16. You don’t have the time
You have 24 hours in a day, and you don’t put aside 30 minutes to stay fit because you don’t want to. I watch TV for twice as long or even longer, and I know you do too. Take 15 minutes out of your internet time and 15 minutes out of your tv time or something else you do that could be reduced to treat yourself to a light workout. Once you get the workout, embed it into your routine, I know four out of ten of you’ll find more time to add to your workout. Even if 30 minutes is too long do 20; if not 10; do what you can, and figure out how to do more as your will and physique strengthen.
17. You don’t eat a pre-workout snack
I went months trying to figure out what to eat before a workout for optimum performance and fat loss. I have already described my snack, but if you don’t want to scroll up again here it is: 1/2 a cup of keifer which contains 7 grams of protein and 4.5 grams of carbohydrates; one or two berries that constitute about 4.5 grams of carbohydrates; about a teaspoon of olive oil which is 4.5 grams of fat. Dr. Sears’ Food Block Guide lists favorable foods from which you could construct a nutrient-equivalent pre-workout snack.
According to Dr. Sears’, the protein stimulates a hormone called glucogen that replenishes blood sugar for energy and keeps the insulin stimulated by the carbohydrates at a level that prevents your blood sugar from dropping; the fat in the olive oil slows the digestion of the entire snack so the insulin stays in check for about 45 minutes into the workout – while in this “Zone” your body is primarily fueled by fat; thus I triple my fat intake for more energy – the adequate amount of fat is 1.5 grams which would be about 1/3 teaspoon of olive oil.
Proofreading the last paragraph, I realize it can be complex. You’ve got to read as much of his stuff as you can and just start the plan, even if it’s not perfect, to make eating nutritiously second nature. You will mess up; but as you learn more you perfect the Zone Diet to your preferences.
18. You smoke too much weed
Weed gets you lazy; believe me I’m not only the president of the Former Blunthead Club for Men; I’m also a client. Smoking blunts for breakfast made me want to pig out and play Mortal Kombat instead of practicing those moves on the mat. My jump shot used to be all net when I was high, nonetheless. I don’t think that’s what Jordan wanted you to do after watching his video “Come Fly With Me.”
19. You exclusively depend on your diet to burn fat
You need an effective exercise routine to cover the mistakes you make dieting. You want to be able to break your diet now and then, so you don’t wind yourself up tighter than Hillary Clinton’s campaign schedule.
20. You don’t have fun with your workout
Play ball daily; racquetball; handball; box; do whatever makes you break a sweat and do some situps afterward. Perform activities you love, so you will never stop. When you get bored of one activity, try another.
21. You don’t take enough fish oil
Fish oil helps control insulin a hormone which keeps you hungry and stops you from burning fat. It’s also great for your brain and heart. Dr. Sears recommends enough fish oil that contains about 3.6 g of EPA. It’s about 2 teaspoons of his brand. I use Michael Murray’s fish oil myself because I can pick it up at the health store around my job.
Just ensure that the fish oil you use is pharmaceutical grade fish oil. Dr. Sears reportedly coined this term to establish a standard at which fish oil should be purified of toxins. Usually the vitamin store brands have too much mercury and other contaminants that could damage your brain.
22. You don’t run
Aside from keeping you from staying sick and keeping your heart healthy, running a minimum of 20 minutes a day will help turn fat into thin air.
23. You don’t eat right after a workout
Have a piece of lean protein – steak, turkey, chicken – about the circumference and width of your palm; serve it on a round plate and fill the rest of the 2/3rds of the plate with fruits and vegetables. Eat a handful of nuts, drizzle your vegetables with some olive oil, or top them with avocado, and you’ve got the perfect recipe for muscle reconstruction. When you don’t eat a nutrient-balanced meal, you will lose muscle and you will have less energy to workout the following day.
24. You eat too much protein
The body only absorbs about 30 grams of protein at a particular sitting; that equates to about 4 oz of lean protein. Cut that top sirloin steak in half and save half for a midday steak sandwich tomorrow.
25. You eat too much sugar
Sugar makes your pancreas secrete too much insulin. When your insulin level is up, your body stops burning fat.
26. You don’t do wind sprints
Sprint are, by far, the most optimal body sculptor. It gets your heart racing, and has you work every muscle in your body. Read this article if you want to get technical.
27. You don’t care whether you’re fat
I used to, jokingly, call friends fat and they used to tell me that they used to still get pussy. I’m a faithfully married man. I workout and try to eat right to look and feel great, not to pick up any girls. I want to have the ability to haul ass as fast as possible in the case of an emergency; the year before last, I was flying to Colombia during the Xmas rush – December 15, 2005; a seat opened up to a flight to Caracas that departed in 15 minutes. My wife was sitting in a gate one side of the terminal about a half a mile away, the plane was flying out a gate a little less than 3/4 of a mile away from that gate; long story short, I sprinted to my wife’s extraction point, we made that plane with two pieces of carry on luggage each.
28. You don’t visualize yourself fit
Close your eyes and see yourself with the six pack, or weighing 10, 20, 50 lbs. less. Keep your eyes closed until you see it in technicolor, then in analog, digital, and on HD. Remember that vision and keep it branded to your mindsight when you feel you can’t run anymore. Your body will control your breath and prompt you to slow down and get back in a rhythm that’ll allow you to finish. The vision will help you shake off the daze and do that extra set with less repetitions. You will finish. You will succeed.
29. You don’t do two-a-days
I stayed in Colombia for about three months in the earlier part of this century. I used to do about three sets of pullups, two sets of inclined, and declined pushups, for about 30 minutes in the morning. I used to play basketball in the afternoon, and literally ate anything I wanted at least 3 times a day – e.g. mounds of rice, steak, fish, coconut candy, soda, coffee. My body fat was about 10%; true story.
If you’ve got the time, do two-a-days, at least, at 20 minutes a piece.
30. You work out alone
I am so much more motivated to workout when people are watching me. It’s like I have an audience. When you work out with somebody you see the other person pushing him or herself and you tell yourself, “I’ll show him or her,” the competitive spirit engages, and you do your sets promptly; you rest less and burn more fat.
31. You drink too much coffee
When coffee is digested insulin is stimulated; you don’t burn as much fat when your insulin levels are up.
32. You’re always sick
Google “natural remedies” for your condition; eat better; see a medical practitioner that practices alternative treatments; stay healthy by all means. I was diagnosed by a doctor at NYU as being lactose intolerant; two years later, I couldn’t eat anything without defecating phlegm. Solution: I got a series of colonics and enemas while juicing on beets and carrot juice, cut off sugar and soy. Result: I haven’t gotten a bed-ridden flu in about 3 years since, and I drink about 16 fl oz of dark chocolate milk daily like an Aztec.
33. You drink too much coke
Phosphoric acid in coke draws calcium from your bones to digest. Your bones get broken or splinted, and you can’t workout anymore. Diet Coke wont do much good either. The carbs also spike up your blood sugar, and makes you stop burning fat. And, yes, marathon runners are known to drink a can for extra kick during a race; ask again, nonetheless, and most say that they will only drink it during a race where they’re burning 1,000 calories an hour.
34. You don’t like to sweat
Let your temperature rise and literally get yourself in the heat of the moment. Your body’s got limbs to be active. So you’ve got to take an extra shower. You wouldn’t be reading this if you were a cat.
35. You don’t think you’re at war
It’s you against the world. Exercise helps you get physically and mentally acute to overcome life’s obstacles. Get the mindset in place and attack the track, weights, or pullup bar with that same intensity. You’ll lose the weight.
36. You’re not an endorphin junkie
When I get up in an irritable mood, only a thorough power session of training sets me straight and readies me for the world. If I don’t workout, It feels as if I didn’t brush my teeth.
Get that addiction too, and it wont take a miracle to burn that extra lard.
37. You’re not an adrenaline junkie
I heard his steps tapping the cement like the second hand in the 60 Minutes intro on my left. His shoulders entered the corner of my left eye, and my eyes widened. The “New York State of Mind” guitar riff looped in my ear; I kicked my knees up higher breathed in fast and deeply like Michael Johnson on the 100M; I would widen my mouth into a joker smile to inhale and blow out like Superman freezing fire to exhale. I took the lead by at least 15 meters and loud onlooker yelled, “Yeah, baby, power!”
If you don’t want it you’ll never have it.
38. You’re not a thrill seeker
Just picture myself being able to run through crowds like I’m Jason Bourne being chased by European police, when I have had to transport myself on foot between a few miles of sidewalk dodging more people than Times Square on New Years, running on the street or just cutting out their way like LaDanian Tomlinson dodging linemen.
39. You don’t make your workout an adventure
Over the river and through the woods. Find some beaten trails in your area on which you could jog without noticing that you’ve run for an hour and you’re dripping in sweat ready to do another lap. Bike for 6 miles through your town’s scenic areas. Hike through a national park. There are more than six to a dozen ways to get your heart pumping and losing weight. Open your mind to heart racing activities that you could enjoy and get back into it.
40. You eat too much soy
I stopped eating everything with soy in it and bing! I was cured of colitis and lactose intolerence; I lost 20 lbs in a month.
One explanation is that soy is in almost every processed food on the market that gets you fat. It’s also used to make MSG, which tears you up mentally and physically. Soy can disrupt thyroid function which can slow down your metabolism and cause you get fat. Just Google Soy, and start to pull the sleep visor off your eyes.
41. You eat too much rice
Rice has practically no fiber and will spike up your insulin levels to have you stop burning fat.
42. You eat the wrong fruit
Raisins, pineapple, bananas, and other tropical fruits are low in fiber and spike up your blood sugar.
43. You don’t eat enough fiber
Fiber slows digestion and helps keep you full longer. Most people think that all that bran cereal and whole wheat bread does the trick; try again! Low density vegetables like brocolli, green beans, and lettuce have all the fiber that digests slow and keeps you full.
44. You don’t recover from a loss
I curled up like a fetus on my bed while tears trickled across my nose because I couldn’t muster up the strength to sprint and push my body to workout for two hours when my blood sugar started dropping. I would wake up, go outside and sit in my carseat, yawning and closing my eyes before a workout. I knew I had lost it when ending a workout I stepped on my block and couldn’t even jog the last 200 meters home. It’s like my energy shut down, and I walked veering to oneside because the sidewalk felt lobsided.
I started to drink in the day because when I caught it, I felt that buzz you get after a first beer. I would also get sugar cravings that once satisfied would get me high; I drank a tall glass of cherry coke watching “Batman Returns” in the theater, and it felt like I had to duck all the swords because it appeared in 3-D to me.
I could have given in, stopped working out, pigged out on Cinnabons and that sweet chicken that orientals hand out in the mall’s food court, and walk around with a square flask of Henessy like a wino everyday. Instead, I stopped running and would do my calesthenic routine for a half-hour everyday. Then I started running 4 miles every other day and 2 miles the other days at a 7 minute-mile pace. No matter what I ate the day before, I would always eat my nutritionally balanced breakfast. Over the past year my body has requested more, little by little. I now workout for an hour to an hour and a half six days week, almost as hard as I did when I was 29, at peak performance.
I know some people have suffered losses causing pain that I could never imagine, but I hope my documentation on overcoming the fear of me thinking that I was really going to die can somehow inspire you to never stop running.
45. You don’t discover the correct way to exercise
Exercises should be done in their proper form to target the areas that need sculpting.
46. You don’t eat enough fat
Once you get your insulin under control your body starts to use fat for energy. If you need more energy you can eat more mono-unsaturated fat for energy – e.g. nuts, olive oil, avocados. Peanut butter is reportedly the next diet food. Buy the natural brand, though; so you avoid the maltodextrin, and other bullshit sweeteners and perser
47. You don’t do pullups
Pull-ups sculpt your body. Do pyramid sets to do more pull-ups. You start by doing one repetition, then two, then three, and so on, until you do the set with the most repetitions you are strong enough to complete; then you start to go down the pyramid by decreasing the amount of reps by one at each set. So if you could only do three, you would do one, then two, then three, and go down the pyramid by doing two, then one, and stopping. You’ll get stronger and get more comfortable with your shirt off. Here’s a quick tutorial.
48. You don’t put your whole life into your workout
Stay on your toes all day. Live a high powered life. When you hear that song that gets you going, see yourself running up that hill at full speed. Remember that song when you get workout the next day and finish strong!
49. You eat too much “diet” food
e.g. Low fat peanut butter has maltodextrin which hikes up the carbs that spike up insulin levels and stops your body from burning fat. A lot of other low fat, and low carb foods have all kinds of perservatives that disrupt your fat loss. Fruits and vegetables have the lowest fat and carb counts with no side effects period. Add the palm-size piece of lean protein and a dash of mono-unsaturated fat, and you’ve got the ideal 40-30-30 combo every early 21st Century diet is trying to sell.
50. You don’t workout to enhance athletic performance
Workout to be stronger; workout to be faster. You get a sense of accomplishment which gives you pleases you to workout and drives you to continue.
51. You don’t take cold showers
Cold showers help you build brown adipose tissue, which creates heat and keeps you from getting cold as easier. People with more brown adipose tissue burn more fat, and have faster metabolism. I wet myself with hot water to get used to being wet. Then I turn off the faucet and lather my body with soap. I rinse with cold water full force. Try it; you’ll love me for it!
52. You don’t run on errands
Jog to the supermarket when you’re missing a dozen eggs; or better still sprint. Run up the stairs when in a building instead of the elevator. Do a little yoga on your lunch break. Anything to break a sweat.
53. You don’t think you could do it
You have to know that you will be fit. The strong belief in yourself will force your mind to give you a plan to find somebody to help you, seek the answers out in the library or the internet, or keep reading my blog.
54. You eat too much fast food
Aside from the aluminum, silicon, and the rest of the garbage that makes you age and lose your reflexes, everything in McDonald’s has sugar in it. Most fast foods have some type of sugar or radiated sweetener that hikes up your insulin levels and stops you from burning fat. All the grease in it doesn’t help to trim that sack of shit hanging from your hip either.
55. You follow the same diet and exercise routine regardless of whether it works
If it doesn’t work try something else. Anything else. Keep experimenting with different plans until you find a fat loss plan that works for you.
I went on a plan that helped me lose 40 lbs, but I had no energy. The Zone Diet has been successful for me so far.
56. You don’t make enough money
Ideally, a good paying job that does not require you to get a second income will allow you to have half an hour to an hour a day to dedicate to an exercise routine. If you have to work two or three jobs to make ends meet you won’t have the time or probably the energy to burn fat, unless you’re always dieting; more power to you.
57. You don’t know how it’s all in your mind
“It’s all you in mind, not physical,” he said. “It’s in your mind.”
I took a deeper breath and hopped over the bench 7 more times.
You can’t just will yourself to do 28 pullups when you’re 5′6″ and weigh 210 lbs. You have to use your mind to learn the way to strengthen your back muscles, so you could first do 10 pullups, then 14, then 18, then 20 and so on. The same principle goes for running; start by running a mile, then two, and increase your distance as you can handle a bigger load.
58. You don’t challenge your body
Now that you’re strong enough to do 20 pullups, why not work yourself up to do 22 then 23, then 25. I see a lot of bodybuilders reach their goals and just stop working out and gain the fat back. Keep pushing yourself to do better. Life’s about solving problems; we will have no more problems to solve when we’re dead. If you’re done at 20 pullups what are you still doing here?
59. You don’t workout with your mouth closed
Throughout the workout’s entirety, I don’t either, but I do run with mouth closed. My objective is to do my whole workout with my mouth closed. The idea is to master your workout. Keep it under control, so you’re not holding your tongue out farther than Odie the dog from Garfield. Then you could start your workout with less hesitation and more focus to exercise correctly and productively enough to burn fat.
60. You have sex before a day of heavy training
I have read that you lose protein and other nutrients that supply the body with energy when you have sex. I for one can tell you that if I have a heavy day of training post an all-night creation of the beasts with two backs, I’m breathing heavier than a woman in labor on the track.
I’ve got a light day of training, and a heavier day of training; I try to handle my business prior to the light day.
61. You don’t visualize yourself finishing each phase of the workout
Break up your workout into mini-evolutions. When one tires you out, see yourself just finishing that evolution and don’t think of the next set. When you’re done, then see yourself finishing that set and so on.
62. You don’t finish your workout routine at all costs
Even if you have to cut down on the amount of reps that you’re doing so you could save your strength to finish, slash ‘em! After the first time I ran eight 100 meter sprints after a four month hiatus, I had to cut my chest repetitions by half to finish every set.
63. You don’t sacrifice anything to workout
Instead of watching TV until 12 pm, watch it until 11:30 pm, so you’ve got 20 minutes to run the morning after. Do what you’ve got to do.
64. You don’t eat to enhance athletic performance
My nutritionally balanced meals and snacks consist of 40% carbs, 30% lean protein, and 30% mono-unsaturated fats. If you were to follow this dietary guideline alone, your ribs’ll start showing again. Just read up on it before you start, then read some more.
65. You are too hungry
You are hungry because your insulin levels are too high, and it stops you from burning fat. Learn how to control insulin by eating a nutritionally balanced meal before you get hungry.
66. You don’t sleep enough
When you don’t sleep enough studies have shown that the body stimulates more of the ghrelin hormone which causes hunger and lower levels of the leptin hormone which tells you that’you are full. Consequences: You eat more and forever stay… you know the rest. On top of that you have less strength to exercise and burn fat.
I always look more thick-bodied after anything less than 7 to 8 hrs of sleep. Once I punch in those 8 hrs, I’m ready for the Men’s Health cover.
67. You over medicate
Antipsychotic medication, anticonvulsants, antihypertensives, protease inhibitors, and diabetes medications all make a person more likely to gain weight according to a latest study. Cortisol replacements like Corteff raise insulin levels that stop fat destruction.
68. You think that you’re fat because it’s hereditary
Other than two of my father’s sisters, everybody in my family a generation before me and most after like most of my cousins and brother are fat. I was on the road to growing titties too. If I were to eat anything in sight and be sedentary, reading this post, I would also be among those saying, “He’s right that is why I’m fat” too.
69. You keep going on Atkins
Aside from ketosis – the process where your body extracts calcium from the bones to digest excessive protein – you start to gain the weight back after six months because your brain starts to trigger cortisol secretion that destroys muscle mass to convert into glucose for the brain. Your body keeps secreting cortisol by stopping the body from using insulin to metabolize carbs into energy; thus your pancreas has to secrete more insulin which stops you from burning fat.
70. You eat cheap vegetable oil
Rich in omega 6 fatty acids and arachadonic acid, I have kept my fat percentage in single digits since I got off vegetable, corn, and canola oil.
71. You drink too much natural fruit juice
Natural fruit juice is fruit without the fiber. It spikes up your blood sugar and triggers fat loss’s arch enemy: insulin. You know the rest of the story.
72. You drink too much other liquid calories
Soda, juices, teas, grape drinks, flavored water, are worse than food because sometimes it’s easier to drink a 600 calorie milk shake and be hungry half an hour later, than to eat a meal with less calories and be full for 3 to 4 hours. Such drinks digest too quickly, and have equivalent or more caloric intake than a nutritious meal.
73. You don’t workout at your exercise heart range
You should workout at 80% of your maximum heart rate to burn that fat that your body stores while doing calesthenics and weights. Here’s a heart-rate chart. This site tells you how to monitor your heart rate.
74. You work out at night
This study showed that athletic performance is hampered at night. Cortisol and insulin levels are up and hinder your desire for any activity. I’m a morning jogger.
75. You travel too much.
If you’re crossing more time zones than the NBA Finals there’s just no way of getting around jet lag which will definitely keep you from working out and keep you fat. Here’s a link to a study conducted on people taking long-haul flights.
76. You don’t drink enough water
In order for you to burn fat you have to drink a minimum of eight 8 oz servings of water. Further, when you feel hungry an hour or two after you’ve eaten, drink some water. You may be mistaking your hunger for thirst. If so, you’ll feel full again. Otherwise, start eating better.
77. You don’t have sneakers for the workout
I used to use cross trainers to sprint. I started getting blisters. The blisters popped, the skin peeled, and the sting made me want to stop running. Don’t let it stop you either. I use a3 AdiPrene by Adidas. They are by far the softest sneakers on which I’ve had the pleasure to haul ass.
78. You drink too much alcohol
Alcohol makes your body the hormonal leaning tower of Pisa. It is a lot harder to get on the track or in the gym on a head-spinning hangover.
Although anybody could get sick of eating meats, fruits, vegetables, nuts and other mono-unsaturated fats everyday, you’ve got to love Dr. Sears movement to make his Zone Diet a lifestyle. Read this post on how he tells this guy how to drink alcohol and still follow the diet. His rule of thumb is to always chase a beer, 4 oz of wine, or any other serving of alcohol with 7 grams of protein, which comes in the form of an ounce of cheese, cold cut or other meat, etc. to keep your hormones balanced.
79. You don’t seek professional help
If you don’t know, you’d better ask somebody. Get your self a personal trainer for at least an hour a week, or a month at least, if you need it. Or go from gym to gym and get the first free workout from a bunch of trainers. Just make sure you’ve got a notepad, so you could write down meal plans and exercise routines.
If you join Bally’s they always hold spin, and other types of group classes. I paid like $19 bucks when I was in.
Aside from training in the military, I’ve taken boxing, Yoga, Pilates, and other aerobic and anaerobic classes to learn how to workout right.
You’ve got to get answers from somewhere. If you can’t find them yourself let somebody find them for you.
80. You are not true to yourself
I always denied that I was angry because my father left me by backing out his Honda Civic, as I watched my reflection twist on its passenger side window and blur through the welled up tears wiggling like Jello on my bottom eyelids.
The first day I documented this memory in my journal, the ink smeared as tears splashed on the letters harder than the people landing on the concrete after jumping out of the World Trade Center.
Anytime I channel the emotions this memory stirs up, I craft some of my most powerful work on and off the track. You can too.
81. You don’t ask what other fit people are doing
If you see somebody that just lost 20 lbs in a month, ask them what they did. If it sounds like a diet and exercise routine you like, do the same thing. I, by no means, recommend pills, nevertheless. They tear up your kidneys and liver. The side effects will destroy your quality of life.
82. You don’t isolate your problem
I used to workout for about 2 hours, 6 days a week in the boxing gym, and I didn’t get the results I wanted. My body fat stayed at 12%. I didn’t know what was the problem until the problem got to know me and gave me colitis. Too many McD breakfast sandwiches and hashbrowns. Too many strawberry shakes. Too much Papa John’s Pizza. Too much eating out period. My mouth was out of control. Once I learned how to eat, the fat disappeared and went down to 6%. I had 8 lbs of body fat. My remedy was probably too extreme, but the idea is that you have to find a way to control your mouth without ending up committed by the state.
Find out what is the problem that does not let you lose weight, isolate it, and treat it by doing trying something new. If it doesn’t work, try something else.
83. You’re too lazy to show up for your appointed workouts
Get up off your ass and do you! Warm up to some ill hip-hop, punk, mozart, or whatever pushes your wig back. Splash some water on your face. Do what you must to get going. Just stay away from the Red Bull; the Taurine will kill you.
84. You’re afraid to get dirty
Run through that mud. Grab that dusty bar across the gate entrance and do some pullups. Get on the dirt and do some abdominals. From dust we were created and to the dust we shall return. A friend of mine didn’t come run with me once because it was sprinkling outside: “My shoes’ll get wet.” Let him dry on your windowsill for Jack’s sake.
85. You’re a snob
So you think you know everything about being healthy and in shape, huh. Your neck’s startin’ to sag like a shar pei, though, and it looks like you may be needing a training bra soon. I have studied nutrition, physical fitness, and health for almost 4 years and still don’t know a decimal of a fraction of it all. I have been able to find some effective resolutions to my health and weight issues that other people have used to improve their well being.
Point being, admit you have to keep learning. Be true to yourself and take in advice with an open mind. Don’t take anything for face value, however. Google it, perform Yahoo! searches, hit the library, ask Dr’s and other specialists and prove it – anything it takes to cure your condition.
86. You don’t workout at work
I’ve been always able to eat while I work and remain productive. This way I could sneak a workout in on my lunch break. Do some dips from the edge of your desk. I did inclined pushups from my cousin’s truck step, when I went to work with him one day, waiting for our turn to drive the truck into the dock. I also used to run up 20 flights of stairs in the Empire State Building. Now I shadow box, do leg work, and skip rope.
87. You hate salad
Salad has the fiber you need to slow digestion and keep you full. Salads are also like popping a multi-vitamin with the minerals required for optimal absorbtion, so your urine doesn’t shoot out brighter than Gatorade. Make you’re own dressing, nonetheless; all that packaged stuff usually has sweeteners and other tasty additives that’ll spike up your insulin – the preservatives aren’t that good for you either. My choice dressing is red wine vinegar, olive oil, and lemon juice. I add the salt and pepper beforehand, so it does the slip-n-slide on the olive oil down all the lettuce leaves into the rest of the salad.
And of course don’t forget the protein. Wash it down with a protein shake with the least preservatives and carbs, or just lunch on a chicken caesar.
88. You rely on the glycemic index
The glycemic index charts you see in Mens’s Health magazines and other fitness resources rate foods by the amount of time it takes 50 grams of its carbohydrate value to enter the bloodstream, stimulate insulin and cause you to be hungry too soon after a sitting and eventually pig out or just put you in a state where insulin is stopping you from burning fat.
The problem arises because many processed and starch based carbohydrates will not fill you up if you eat the amount containing 50 grams of carbs. For instance, 1 cup of linguine has about 54 grams of carbohydrates. I eat at least twice as much pasta than that on Saturdays, when I buy lasagna on my off days. So I get a higher insulin response for which the glycemic index doesn’t account and stops me from burning fat… for a day or two.
The glycemic load is a standard that multiplies the glycemic index of a food by its insulin-stimulating carb count – the carb count a food contains after the grams of fiber have been substracted. Read “Understanding Carbs” by Dr. Sears for a broader interpretation, and how you could leverage the glycemic load to moderate your insulin levels and burn fat.
89. You aren’t a student of nutrition
Learn what each food does to your body. Know how much protein a 4 oz of steak has and that it stimulates glucagon, a hormone that controls insulin; know that if you eat more than that in one sitting it’s more than likely that the rest of the steak will turn into fat. Know how many carbs a pear has, and how its skin is like a mild laxative. Know that potatoes have little fiber and stimulate insulin enough to stop you from burning fat.
Learn as much about nutrition as you can. Then you can knowingly make decisions as to what will fatten you and what wont. Live life on your terms.
I learn about information from many sources. You can get an objective perspective from Dr. Barry Sears. The Atkins for life program, where you start to add fruits and other fiber rich carbs to your diet, is almost a replica of his plan.
90. You procrastinate
Just do it.
91. You don’t widen your eyes after tiring sets
Let me so those baby blues, son! That last set got you looking for more runway than a jumbo jet. “Everybody get up!” And that goes for everyone of your body parts that are holding you up right now. Hop lightly on your feet. Swing your arms across your body. Get the blood pumpin’, and you’ll be back home drinking your protein shake in no time.
92. You rest too long in between sets
I’ve seen you talking for more than you workout at the gym. Don’t become a heart patient by trying to rest less than 10 seconds in between sets, but try to keep your rest times to a minimum. I keep them under 20 seconds while doing calesthenics; wind sprinting is a chore, nevertheless. Rest times under 30 seconds are optimal for fat disintegration. But if you feel like George Foreman after catching Ali’s right cross on his chin in the eighth round, when you don’t take a minute breather, take as much time as you can and cut your rest times by 10 second intervals each time your heart strengthens. Consult your doctor with any heart issues.
93. You don’t vocally motivate yourself
“Forward!” I bark to myself. “On your feet!” Whatever triggers me to grab that bar, bend my knees against my chest, and start to twist ‘em like a propeller until my intestines feel like they’re being blended in the Magic Bullet.
94. You don’t add different levels of resistance
At eight layers of resistance, I wore a long sleeve button shirt, sweatshirt, hoodie sweatshirt, a nylon vest with a cotton lining, sweat pants, Timberland chukkas, and my old Navy fatigue cap. I could break a sweat in a blizzard. I literally turned fat into water through a skin splitting New York winter in 2004. It was so cold that I had to stretch the skin up next to my nose, so I could breathe running 1/4 mile sprints.
When you add these levels of resistance, your body temperature increases, and you burn fat easier. I don’t need to bundle up as much during the summer months, or when I sprint because the intensity gets my body temperature and heart racing regardless. I recommend it when you do long runs for 30 minutes or longer at a 8 to 10 minute mile pace. Get some hill work in your run, and you’ll see the difference in the mirror.
95. You don’t read the nutrition facts label on your foods
Find out how much protein, fat, fiber, or carbohydrates a serving of this stuff’s got. Make this a ritual prior to deciding on eating anything. Google or run another type of search on fruits and vegetables that don’t have nutrition facts labels. Now you know how to fit it into your meal plan, by either knowing how many calories it has or carbs, protein, fat or whatever other nutrient value you have to know to stay on your weight loss plan.
Even if I know I am going to o.d. and eat way more than a serving size, I use this information to motivate myself to execute a thorough workout the next day to make up for my, uh, oversight, yeah. Knowing I turned a 100 g-carb Cinnabon into nothing but finger swirls of caramel streaks tells me that I’ve got a lot of sugar from which to burn 6X400 meters of track upon my next rising.
Last One. You don’t dig deep
Know that you will finish no matter what. Other people run a mile and a half without issues, why can’t you? In the words of the great Bishop, “You need to put the wind behind your back, partna’!”
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